Dear Jo
Today, as I celebrate 14 years of freedom, courage, resilience, and new beginnings, I find myself thinking of you. Coincidentally, while lost and walking, I ended up at the hostel you found for me to stay 14 years ago. You know I don’t believe in coincidences. It reminded me of the generosity they showed by letting me stay for free until I found a safe home when my one-year dual housing benefit that you fought for ended. Throughout my journey, I have encountered many people like you who have gone beyond the call of duty.
As I reflect on this journey, I can’t help but wonder if you would be proud of me. Most days, I forget to be grateful for being accepted into three universities despite being the girl who hadn’t finished primary school and had never been to high school. Instead, I complain that I am still studying, just like when we first met 14 years ago. While I still value my worth in my grades, I am slowly learning to value my effort and passing. I continue passing with remarkable grades, regardless of what life throws at me. Yet, I wonder if you could see me now—would you be proud of the effort, time, and care you invested in me?
I keep finding myself in a place where I feel I have nothing concrete to show for these past 14 years, even though I’ve found faith and changed longstanding family and cultural traditions for new generations of women in my family. I often forget to feel proud of myself, to see how smart I am, to trust myself, or to acknowledge all I’ve accomplished to get here. I still lament being single and not having a biological baby at 36, reflecting on the past 14 years. I wonder if you could see me now—would you be proud of the effort, time, and care you invested in me?
Despite learning so much about human behavior, I still find it hard to understand humans and many aspects of life. Yet, babies and children adore me. I have learned to trust the opposite sex and show compassion to others. I wonder if you could see me now—would you be proud of the effort, time, and care you invested in me?
In the midst of all this, I often forget that I have won the war. Today, I live in a home where I feel safe, and I can rest without guilt. I can wear whatever I want, walk the streets without fear, and I don’t panic at the thought of people knowing my name or address. I remain a part of my siblings’ lives and their children, and I have made peace with my parents. My anger has transformed into empathy, and I haven’t lost my sense of humor. Yet, I still wonder if you could see me now—would you be proud of the effort, time, and care you invested in me?
Although I am not sure what your answer would have been, I will continue to strive to leave every place I go better than I found it, showing care, compassion, and empathy to everyone I encounter, even the difficult ones. I will continue to give back all the care, humanity, and dedication that has been shown to me. Every year on this day, I will remember you and all the women who went above and beyond for me, thanking them for their support. I will also continue to express my gratitude to God for His mercy and grace. I will strive to honor all the effort, time, and care you have shown me, and I promise to make you proud.
I am incredibly grateful for you, wherever you are, and for all my support network. Thank you for being one of my points of light.
I will leave you with one of my favorite song quotes: “If you see what’s wrong and you try to make it right, you will be a point of light.” — Randy Travis
With all my love,
H
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